collaboration

Skills for Collaboration

Posted on by vivslack

This winter I have been reflecting on the projects and communities i have been part of in recent years, thinking about what is happening when collaboration is working well, compared to when it is not.

We often say that we need people to have ‘good communication’, but what do we mean when we say that? What does good communication look like? Here are some of the top things I see that help…

  • Saying clearly what you want / need / see is needed.
  • Saying ‘no’ if you are not genuinely willing.
  • Saying ‘yes and’ or ‘yes or’ to integrate your insights and needs alongside others.
  • Capacity to hear things that are triggering or uncomfortable and processing them.
  • Capacity to stay in connection when there’s disagreement or conflict.
  • Accepting when there’s not alignment, when to let go, allowing grief.
  • Sensing when to pause to get clear / make agreements, and when to crack on and try things out.

In projects where people are working well together on a shared mission, I generally see a culture of deep listening, generative dialogue, ways of integrating different ideas and capacity to navigate conflict. And when it is not working so well, I see criticism rather than feedback, competition rather than collaboration, and things getting stuck in cycles of blame and pain. Sometimes culture and structure can shift that, and sometimes things need to fall apart and reform elsewhere with a different culture and group dynamic.

(You can see a more in depth reflection of a recent project with GM Systems Changers here.)

One of the places that skills for collaboration becomes especially important is where people are living together as a community. We are currently helping out at Myoho Valley which is a land based community in Portugal. I asked Helios who has been running this place over the last few years ‘What do you see helps?’ – this is their response…

  1. Dealing with issues & finding solutions in real time. This prevents build up of resentment, gossip, time wasting etc, and keeps things dynamic.
  2. Everyone needs to be responsible for themselves – sticking to what we say, being okay with reminders if we forget something etc, and self aware.
  3. Everyone needs a private space to go if living communally for any reasonable amount of time. This enables people to stay grounded in their own energy when in a communal living area.
  4. Regular group meetings to check in personally/practically, so the team is in the same page. It’s a good opportunity to keep track of who is where.
  5. You need the courage to speak up in a group when conflict is involved, and i notice that many people don’t have this. Courage with communication and perhaps more practise/study on that for individuals is something that can make collaboration and safety in a community work more effectively.

Thinking of projects and communities that you have been part of, is there something specific you have seen that helps or hinders collaboration?

Or would you like to develop stronger skills and capacity to collaborate and communicate?

There is always more to learn. Please get in touch or post in the comments if you have insights, or if you would like support either as an individual or for your group / community.

GMSC – Reflections 2025

Posted on by vivslack

As another year draws to an end, I’m reflecting on many things, including this year’s collaboration as a member of GM Systems Changers. We seem to be coming to a closing phase, with members voting to redistribute the remaining funds out to organisations, and also in a pause whilst we await the outcome of a whistle blowing process facilitated by The Social Change Agency. Here are a few personal reflections / questions…

Even with strong connections and co-created shared agreements, collaboration might not work out.

I have had a strong belief for some years that if we can agree a clear vision, mission and values together, and co-create shared agreements and systems, many of the conflicts we see in collaborations would disappear. Bringing in learning from Miki Kashtan/NGL, experiences in XRUK, and from many projects we have worked in previously, we did all the ‘right things’. We spent time together sharing from the heart and building connections. We wrote our vision, mission, values and red lines together. We had clear systems for decision making, making proposals, integrating feedback, and navigating conflict. And still, trust broke down so easily – we are choosing to dismantle, and in a whistle blowing process. Whether that is another chapter or the end of the network, it shows up something about our current capacity to navigate divergence.

Maybe ‘Collective Liberation’ is too broad a vision to unite around?

A strong part of what binds us is a shared commitment to ‘Collective Liberation’. We talked extensively about what that means, tried to weave in practices that supported us to embody it in our reflections and relationships, and attempted to articulate it in our vision and mission. But looking again at our statements of shared intention on our website, I wonder if it is too broad, too intangible, too hard to gather around and make real? I see us strong and united when it comes to the mission to ‘challenge exploitative and oppressive structures and systems‘, and not so much around ‘creating and supporting the evolution of alternative realities towards collective liberation.‘ Maybe it is no surprise, we have had to group together to challenge current systems, and not often had opportunity to be together in asking what liberation might look and feel like. Amazing work is being done in organisations with their own clear vision, and we hoped we might also find something collective to gather around. We harvested a long list of possibilities but nothing clear jumped up to unite around. Perhaps that needs to happen more organically, be more distributed, maybe something clear will emerge later. Time will tell.

It seems hard to make requests / say what we want.

An observation related to the above is in how often i heard members able to say what they didn’t like/want, and less able to say what they did. That is probably for all sorts of reasons, and likely includes fear of hearing a no, trying to avoid negative reactions or fracture, and also simply having less capacity and practice in realising what we want and asking for it. I see it in myself too, how it is less risky to name all the possibilities than to clearly speak up from intuition. Even with a culture and structures designed to bring in different voices and ideas, there was more often criticism than a proposal/request.

A commitment to see all perspectives can keep things stuck.

Within this project I am a member, but have also taken on a facilitation role. Adding that to a general commitment to see all perspectives and bridge divides, I see how there are times when focus on this role has shut down other energy that wanted to come through. I couldn’t allow the possibility of having a reaction or saying no because i was identified with that role, and focused on understanding other people. Lately I have found both sadness and anger in me about some of what has happened, alongside understanding and acceptance. At a time when we desperately need to find ways to collaborate towards alternative realities and unite, we have fallen back into criticism, mistrust and fracture. I guess I hoped that we would find a different way through this time, and part of me feels hopeless – with all the trauma and socialisation that lives in us, and within a system based on scarcity and competition, is it really possible? If so, how?

Where to go from here?

It doesn’t feel the right time of year to look for clarity about what next, but I do want to let these reflections in so they can do their work on me. Whatever the members decide, there is a natural pause, and a personal stepping back. Personally I remain committed to this mission, and to relationships built through this process, maybe especially through moments where we stayed in connection and worked through hard things. I want to hear and integrate whatever the whistle blowing process brings, and to support however i can beyond that. Most of all i hope that over time, as we get clearer on what ‘Collective Liberation’ actually looks and feels like in this time and context, we will continue to share insights and resources, help each other out, look for the best in each other whilst also having the courage to challenge.

I have a big heart for this collective, and feel a lot of love for all of us. May we keep daring to reach for what we know is possible.

Do you have your own insights or reflections? I would love to hear.